Instant Messenger

I’m listening to: Slick Shoes - Far From Nowhere - 07 - Simon’s Quest

Alright… This has been accumulating for a while, and is ready to rip. AOL Instant Messenger is the single handed most useless program ever written for the Windows Operating Systems (at least for most people apparently)!!!!

Let’s discuss this people… well no, let ME discuss with myself, it has a better effect. Gee shraps, how many people do you enjoy talking to online? The answer: not too many. I hate it how as soon as seven o’clock rolls around every person on my buddy list decides it is time to chat. Do I look like some old person who enjoys sitting on their front porch in a rocking chair talking to other boring people about how bad life sucks and we will all die soon? No, so I don’t want to talk to you either. As for conversation topics, here are the ones that I enjoy seeing:

*Did you you know that you are the coolest person? I wish I could be like you. NOTE: this does not contain any request for response, nor does it ask for any tricks to be as cool as me.
*Did you hear that so and so broke their neck and is currently in intensive care? NOTE: if you are going to contact me about someone else, it better be something like this, life threatening… if they are already dead… tough luck, I don’t really care at this moment, the funeral won’t be for at least a few days.
*JD, would you like to do something aka go to a movie, go put-putting, go cause trouble. NOTE: this is the true purpose of AIM, to make conversation easier than having to call to plan things.

Now, let me discuss some things which I DO NOT wish to see:

*HI ITS ME, GUESS WHO?>?!?!?!??!? NOTE: This is ridiculous. The fact that anyone would instant message me with the expectations of me playing a guessing game is ludacris.
*Can you help me with such and such? NOTE: I am not a tutor, nor tech support… If you would like help, including counseling, I would be happy to supply this for the low cost of $6.95 an hour.
*What does your name mean? NOTE: If I felt that everyone and their mother had the attention span to listen to the riveting story of how I came to be called shraps, I would post it somewhere… it is a mystery because you are simply not capable of understanding it… If you want to understand it, think.

Now, let us discuss faces. Online faces are a very touchy subject with me. There are three faces that I do not mind seeing. They are as follows: :P, :), :(. If I see anything else, you can garuntee that my mouse is quickly approaching the block button.

Since we touched the topic of blocking, there is another subject that needs to be mentioned. Since I am so insanely popular, I get a large quantity of AIMs from people every day. To avoid this, I simply block all names which start like the following: (Note: I gave a list of names which I feel might help you to find a name I can stand.)

Alright, now that we have all of this out of the way, hopefully I can live in peace. Now, if you would like to talk to me still, continue to do so, I will block you at my own discretion.

-shraps